Lyme Disease + Mental Health And My Journey to Healing

AHHHHH! It has been a long time since I wrote a blog post. Thank you so much for being patient with me. My last post was before I had my second son, Rhett. Clearly, you can tell two kiddos consumed the majority of my time the last 18 months 🙂 It’s been a year and a half of learning how to love and parent two kids (sometimes solo because my husband travels frequently for work), manage a growing fitness business (my clientele doubled in 2023), find time to pour into my marriage, volunteer at church and Nathaniel’s preschool, invest in community, help start a new clothing company, and the list goes on and on. Each of these things individually has brought me so much life. They have stretched me, challenged me, and allowed me to use the gifts I have been given. However, in the midst of all the good, I have also been dealing with some health issues. Here’s a little more behind the scenes from the last year…

THE BACK STORY

 

2022 was hard!! And I kept thinking to myself “Two kids should not be this hard. Why am I so exhausted? Why do I get frustrated so quickly? Why does it feel like I am just trying to keep my head above water? ” This season should not leave me feeling like I was barely surviving. 

 

By the end of summer 2022 (10ish months postpartum), I was absolutely exhausted (taking naps daily + getting at least 8 hours of sleep at night), nauseous on a daily basis, often dizzy– stopping me dead in my tracks and making me sit down for minutes to hours, emotions were ALL over the place, extreme brain fog– there were nights I couldn’t even read a book to my sons because I couldn’t recall the word in my brain from looking at the letters on the page AND every day I would have at least 10 alarms set so I could remember to do even the basic daily tasks, joint stiffness, swollen fingers and toes, tingling sensation in my fingers/ arms, rash on my arm, extreme anxiety, etc. 

 

Talk about being humbled. I was in a place where I couldn’t do most of my daily tasks on my own any more. Just keeping up with the boys took it all out of me. I limited my driving in fear of getting dizzy on the road. I felt isolated. I felt confused. I felt completely exhausted. I had to ask for help more often than I desired (and I still should have reached out more). 

 

My yearly physical in April said I was “healthy”, but something was not right. I went back to my doctor to get more labs done and simultaneously went a holistic approach and did a hair mineral analysis. All the results came back at the beginning of October and rocked my world…

Lyme disease ✅

Lyme disease co-infections ✅

Parasites ✅

Hormones imbalance check ✅

Toxicity overload ✅

Mold ✅

Countless food sensitivities ✅

 

When I finished reading the results, I just cried. Cried because I was overwhelmed. Cried because I didn’t know what to do next. Cried because I was scared.

 

I was thankful for answers but I felt like this led to even more questions. I started researching and getting consultations with several different doctors. (I typically lean more towards a holistic/ functional medicine approach. However, I do think there are some amazing doctors out there and medicine that can help as well. I wanted to be thorough and check both sides). By the middle of October I was working with an infectious disease doctor who had me on an antibiotic for 30 days. Simultaneously, I was working with a holistic health practitioner that was helping restore my gut and strengthen my immune system. 

 

I honestly felt like I had a great plan. I was covering every basis and I was going to be healthy by the end of the year!!

 

Unfortunately, at the end of my 30 days of antibiotics, everything wasn’t fixed. My symptoms were slightly better, but nowhere close to how I felt before I was pregnant with Rhett (less than 2 years ago).

_____

 

As my physical health was “failing me” so was my mental health. For the first time in my life, I was dealing with crippling anxiety. It was quickly impacting every area of my life. I dreaded the moment Drew said he was leaving on another trip and I was alone with the kids. I would jump at every noise in the house thinking someone was breaking in. The slightest push back from the boys would send me over the edge. And there were days I wouldn’t leave the house after dark due to being paralyze buy fear of “what could happen…”. I  yelled more than ever before. I cried more than ever before. I worried more than ever before. 

I have several friends that have dealt with (or are still dealing with) anxiety. I would listen to their stories and offer empathy, but I never fully understood. UNTIL NOW! Anxiety can truly impact every area of your life.

In November, my counselor suggested I was depressed. 

These words BROKE ME! I would say at this point, I was at one of the lowest points of my life.

I pride myself on being “healthy”. I am an active person. I eat mostly healthy (though I do love a good treat). I go to church. I have good friends. I was doing ALL the right things to live a healthy lifestyle (or so I thought), but here I was mentally and physically falling apart. 

 

At this moment, I knew something more had to change….

 

FINDING THE RIGHT DOCTOR

 

Like I said, the antibiotics didn’t seem to do the trick. Though several medical doctors I consulted said this would be the answer, most of my symptoms were still there (just not as strong). I began going more of a holistic/ functional health route. I wanted to get to the ROOT of the issue.

 

What I have learned is Functional Doctors, DOs, NDs, and Holistic Health Practitioners focus on the whole-body. They see everything is connected and treating one part naturally impacts another. There are lots of Medical Doctors (MDs) that are also functional doctors, but not most of them. Medical Doctors typically have a specialty training and will not go outside their scope of practice. Therefore, not able to focus on the whole body. This does not mean MDs are bad. I know some absolutely amazing MDs. For me and the complexity of what was happening with my body, I was searching for one doctor that could focus on everything happening!

 

Unfortunately, the more I searched the more I struck out. I never knew finding the right doctor would take so much work. 

• I called Lyme specialists and they were $600-$1,000 an hour.
• I called highly recommended functional doctors and they had year long waitlists or were not taking new patients. 
• I started a protocol with a holistics practitioner and she prescribed a supplement that clearly states “Do NOT take if you have a red meat allergy” (which is a side effect of tick borne illnesses). I quickly stopped working with her. 

 

I honestly felt defeated for a while. 

 

While I was striking out with doctors, I was doing a ton of my own research. I listened to 25+ hours of medical webinars on Lyme disease/ chronic illnesses. I have read blogs and listened to podcasts and studied medical websites. 

 

I was also working on my mental health. I made some significant lifestyle changes in hopes they would positively impact my mental health. 

• I began meeting with mentors on a weekly basis
• I took a long break from social media
• I started a thankfulness journal where I write 3 things I am thankful for everyday 
• I started reading the Bible more frequently 
• I stopped watching/ reading the news
• I became more strict with my diet
• I adjusted my workout routine

I have to say, these changes were NOT all easy. I LOVE red meat and sweets and little treats here and there. I recently went to a restaurant while we were traveling and just cried when I looked at the menu. I couldn’t eat anything on it. In that moment, I had a choice to make- what will bring me life right now? There are days I want to give up/ throw in the towel and go back to my old ways. They weren’t bad! But I also don’t want to go back to the pain of the past season. 

There are other things that have been so easy to add!! I look back now and think, “Why weren’t these in my life earlier?” I am beyond thankful for the people that have been speaking such truth to me. The thankfulness journal has helped me see the positive even in harder days which has shifted my mindset. And I have to admit, not reading the news has been sooooo life giving 🙂 I might not know everything going on, but I’m okay with that right now.

Slowly but surely health started to be restored. 

 

WHERE I AM NOW

 

I’m on the road to healing!! And I’m learning it’s not linear and it’s not quick. I’ve taken several steps forward and a few steps back. I’ve loved some of the people I’ve worked with and I’ve “fired” others and had to start all over. I’ve learned I have to really advocate for my own health in a way I never have before. If you have ever dealt with chronic illness, you know this is not something that is fixed overnight!Or in a month. Chronic illnesses often take a long time to heal. 

 

I recently started working with an ND (naturopathic doctor). NDs do a very intensive school just like MD (medical doctors). However, they take a whole-person approach to wellness. This specific doctor has her own healing journey from Lyme disease and has a passion to help others truly and fully heal from Lymes disease AND all other ways it has affected your body. 

 

At this point I am feeling much better than I was in the fall, but I am no where close to the finish line. Some symptoms have completely disappeared, some come and go, others are still very much still there. I kept waiting to wrote this blog. Thinking I would share the hard time and the victory that came with it.  But I am not there yet. Instead you will be walking this journey with me.

 

A FEW THINGS I’VE LEARNED ALONG THE WAY

 

I want to state that obviously I am not a doctor. I am someone who is on their own healing journey and sharing some of the things I have learned. If you are dealing with an illness or want to boost your health in general, I highly suggest talking with a doctor.

 

There are a lot of things you can do on your own to start your own healing journey!!! And most of them don’t cost you anything extra (thank goodness, because this healing journey can get very expensive). 

 

• GRATITUDE and MEDITATION are VERY IMPORTANT: Getting your mind in the right place is essential to full body healing. Both of these can have positive effects in the brain as well as your nervous system. Mediation is even linked to improving the immune system. Something so simple can have HUGE impacts in our health. Below are a couple articles HERE and HERE with some science behind both. 
• MOVEMENT is a MUST: I am clearly a fan of exercise, but I am learning you have to find the right exercise for the each season of life. (And I would love to help you if this has been a struggle). Though I have been tired, I know there are many benefits from exercise for my mind and my body each day.  HERE is an article about the benefits of exercise with chronic illnesses
• FOOD is MEDICINE: What you eat is either helping your body or hurting your body. Now, more than ever, I have seen how the right foods can bring healing to my body (as well as eliminating the wrong foods can also bring healing). Consulting a doctor is always best to make sure your specific needs are met. But a great place to start is increasing your vegetables and eating a wide range of colors. Also limiting your sugar and alcohol. 
• ADVOCATE for YOURSELF: I have learned I need to do my own research, fight for what I believe is right, and sometimes is it best to walk away and find a doctor that is a better fit. 
• ELIMINATE STRESSORS: Everyone has different stressors. What might bring anxiety for me might bring life for someone else. It is important to do an inventory of the things you put into your mind. From there ask yourself “Does this bring life or stress?” I personally have stopped reading the news, took a long break from social media, and started reading when I wake up AND before I go to bed (instead of being on my phone). Again, calming the nervous system can have huge impacts in your overall health.
  

 

FINAL THOUGHTS 

 

My story is so much longer than this blog post. However, I figured this was a great way to get it started. My heart behind this is to connect with other people going through or have overcome chronic illnesses. To be completely honest, this has been a very hard season, but I am know I am not alone. I know there are so many others also dealing with similar issues. I hope my story can bring light and purpose to a challenging time for someone else.

And know, I am still here!!! I am still a mom to two wonderful yet wild boys! I am still training and absolutely love my clients! I am still a wife to an amazing husband.  I am still a friend (though I might not have as much to give this season OR probably forgot to respond to your text-oops)!